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When we recieve this enormous priceless gift of forgiveness from God, He expects us to in return give forgiveness to others around us. When in comparison to God's sacrifical gift of forgiveness, how could we possibly hold back forgiveness from someone who lied about us or hurt our feeling. How could we possibly hold back forgiveness from someone who hurt us because of some pettiness or foolishness after knowing what a great gift of forgiveness God gave. There is no pain and hurt that someone could put us through that could even compare to the sacrifice that God gave us through Jesus Christ. I think the lowest most vile of all sinners is when an adult hurts a child, whether verbally or physically. Adults that hurt children totally disgusts me. They are the lowest most pathetic cowards. But even these kinds of people you have to try to find the strength in your heart to forgive, move on and just stay away from them. Some hurts are very deep and devastating but easier to forgive when put in perspective the gift of forgiveness that God gave to us. Most hurts and unforgiveness Christians go through on a daily basis is not because of an extreme act like someone has beaten, nailed to a cross and comitted murder. Most of the time it is something petty like someone telling lies about you, cutting you off in traffic or stealing your boyfriend or girlfriend. There are some however who has gone through situations as extreme as death or rape. These cases is when the love, grace and mercy of God is needed the most to help you through it. You have to start out in prayer saying, "God I hate what these people have done to me or my loved one but I want to forgive them and move on with my life, please help me." Just because you choose to forgive someone does not at all mean you are relieving them of the punishment they deserve for the pain they caused you or your loved one. But the punishment is up to God. Just give it to Him. If they broke the law they will go to jail. If they get away with their crime through the world's system then God will vindicate you and punish them Himself. (Psalm 57:2; Ps 135:14) No one gets away with anything if you give it to God. He will balance the books sooner or later. And most of the time their punishment is far worse than what they did to you. As a Christian in an evil world you will have trials, pain and tribulation. (John 16:33) We are not in Heaven yet where everything is rainbows and butterflies. It is just one of those things you have to suck up and accept as a Christian. Sinners and the world are going to tell lies about you and they are going to hurt you if they can. But the bible says God has overcome the worlds pain. To me that means He knows how to either shield us from the pain if He knows it will totally defeat us or He knows how to strengthen us and walk us through it. One way or another when terrible things happen God is with us and everything will be alright. Just let it go and move on. Forgiveness is not a feeling we have it is a decision we make. If someone hurts you it will be a cold day in Hell before you FEEL like apologizing to them or even looking at them. Forgiveness is a command from God. He doesn't say forgive if you feel like it. He says forgive others or you yourself will not be forgiven of your sins and faults. (Mathew 6:12-15) You have to just make a decision to forgive them and then forget about it. It is hard especially when you absolutely know you have done nothing wrong and it is all their fault. God doesn't care who's fault it is or who started it. I get a clearer picture of this if I see my children disagreeing about something. I just tell them who cares who started it. Stop pouting, arguing and crying about it. We are family and we love each other so apologize, get over it and let it go. I know God feels like that with His children. How often are you suppose to forgive someone? As often as it takes. If you choose to be around someone who you absolutely know is rude, disrespects you and will hurt and lie about you then you must in turn choose to forgive them over and over again or forgive them once and get away from them.(Mathew 18:21-22) Just because you offer an apology or forgiveness to someone does not mean you are willing to ignore their behavior or keep yourself open to being hurt by them again. You have to again say to the people, "I forgive you for the hurt and the pain you have caused me and I ask for your forgiveness for my part of this, but because you have such poor character and I can't trust you then I am not going to be able to allow you into my life to hurt me again." Then let it go. Give it to God and don't associate with them anymore. You can't change other people and you can't make people behave and treat you right. But you don't have to take verbal or physical abuse from anyone, no matter who they are. You have to be cautious not to judge others. God says do not judge or you will be judged. When someone's true character and nature has been revealed to you, it is not judgement to choose not to associate with them. The bible says do not associate with certain people in the world like liars, thieves, murderers, drunks, ect.. Choosing to disassociate yourself with people of poor character is not judgement it is wisdom and discernment. I have several people within my own extended family who are vile, evil people that can not be trusted. I don't wish anything bad against them. I pray for their salvation. I invite them to church so God can have opportunity to deal with them. But I will not hang out with them or allow my children to hang out with them. I refuse to have people in my life who I absolutely know will take advantage of me or my children if they have a chance. So I try to minimize the chance of that hurt by keeping people of poor character at a comfortable distance. If I do have to be around them I am polite but completely guarded. A quick anology to compare to is a wild animal. You can't trust a wild animal. It is their nature to kill and hurt. I don't want all wild animals killed. I don't want to bring a wild animal home to my family and have a wild animal as a family pet. They have their place in this world and I have mine. Our world's can not be shared. As a Christian living in a sinful world surrounded by sinful selfish people you will have opportunity on a daily basis to be offended and hurt. However, God really will not tolerate unforgiveness from His children. Most of the time unforgiveness does not even affect the other person you are holding bad feelings toward. Unforgiveness greatly affects you and your Christian walk. If you have bad feelings against someone and you do something wrong and need forgiveness yourself, then God will not forgive you of your wrongs until you go to that person and make things right and offer them forgiveness or an apology for their wrongs. If they choose not to accept your apology, that's not your problem anymore that is between them and God, you have done your part. If you are dealing with a sincere Christian they will accept and you have gained a friendship back. If they are not a Christian they probably won't accept your apology or apologize to you. Don't expect goodness from people who are not good. Go ahead and prepare yourself for the rejection if your are dealing with a nonChristian. Do your part and then stay away from them. If someone offends you and they apologize, you will know they are sincere if they don't do the same thing again. Repent means stopping one behavior and going another way. Lets say someone at your work gossips about you behind your back and you confront them about it. They apologize and you accept. The next day you hear them gossiping about you again. Well they were not really sorry when they apologized the first time. Just recognize they have poor character and stay away from them. If someone is really sorry and really wants your forgiveness you will be able to see it in their actions and their words. If you hurt someone you will not do the same thing to them again either. Sincere forgiveness can be seen. Actions can be louder than words sometime. God will not even accept any good deeds or tithes from us to Him or to the church if we have aught or unforgiveness against others. If you are arguing with someone all week, you can't come to church and act like everything is alright. God knows every little thing that is going on in your life. God will not even listen to your prayers if you have unforgiveness in your life. (Mark 11:25&26) God even knows the bad thoughts that you may have had toward others. So all that singing and praising you are suppose to be doing to Him and all that money you are throwing in the offering plate means nothing until you make things right in your heart. God also will not ignore the unforgiveness you have against someone just because you go out and do nice things for other people. Doing nice things or charitable things for one person will not erase unforgiveness you have toward someone else. For example, you may have cursed out your neighbor but you buy your sister a new dress or take the pastor to lunch. God says give forgiveness to your neighbor first or your other charitable gifts and good deeds mean absolutely nothing. You HAVE to make things right with everyone or your acts of kindness means nothing to God. If you have unforgiveness in your life that is not dealt with properly it can make you physically sick and even cause physical damage that could kill you. (Mark 2:9)Strife and anger can cause stress and high blood pressure which could lead to heart attack or stroke. You could get ulcers and migraine headaches. Giving forgiveness to people can help you be a healthier person. Don't let the foolishness of ignorant people get the best of you and damage your life and your health. Don't let pride stop you from apologizing to someone you may have hurt. Don't let unforgiveness take away your happiness, joy and peace. Don't give negative situations that much power in your life. The first step is usually the hardest but once you take that first step and decide to give forgiveness, God rushes in with His loving arms and gives you the comfort, peace and strength you need to walk it out and surrender the situation to Him. Just do it. Don't let the sun go down on your anger. (Ephesians 4:26) You get what you give in life. If you criticize and slander people then people will do the same to you. If you lie and backstab then the same will come upon you. If you are self centered and hateful then you will get that back. The world calls it karma, but God says in Galatians 6:7, "Be not deceived, God is not mocked. Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap." Luke 6:37, "Judge not and ye shall not be judged; Condemn not and ye shall not be condemned; Forgive and ye shall be forgiven." |
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